"Prune Pie"

Grandma used to bake pies every Monday
At least a dozen or so
One afternoon they cooled on the porch
Exactly numbered in status quo
All but one accounted for
Under the porch we went
Eating the pie with enthusiasm
Not knowing what it meant
My brothers inquiry about the pie
I thought it to be minced myself
Unaware it was a prune pie
That rested upon the shelf
We ate pretty near three quarters
Fed the rest to the cat
~
Eruptions began about midnight or so
We took turns standing by the toilet
Regardless of what we did it was all in vain
Nothing seemed to foil it
Three o'clock came,we were both beet red
My brother nearly in tears
We returned to the featherbed mattress
Well worn out beyond our own years
The folks ate those pies a spoonful at a time
Once a day for good measure
Little did we know about its purpose
They did not eat that pie out of pleasure
~
He wouldn't stop crying that night
Brother complained that it really burned
Readily I headed for the medicine cabinet
Quite soon after I returned
With a bottle of red mercurochrome
Directing him to get on all fours
I touched the glass tube to his place of discomfort
Muffling him to keep from the roars
The bottle of red liquid up in the air
Plopping down on the bed in its spill
There it was a big red splotch
The kind that would make grandma kill
Quickly we turned the mattress over
Then going on to sleep
Threatening my brother with penalties of death
If my secret he did not keep
~
Up for the day and out to play
Grandmother knew her house well
She sensed something amiss in the house
Her bed was out of sorts she could tell
When she discovered the splotch in the middle
Immedeately I got the blame
Soon thereafter she took out the rug beater
Proceeding to cause it to flame
Across my backside she scored me
I blamed it on the prune pie
Then I got it some more for stealing
She let that instrument fly
To this day I avoid the prune
Remembering my lesson well
The prune pie and the featherbed mattress
And the day the mercurochrome fell

~Moses~
© 2007 Moses Lestz - All Rights Reserved